WORDS BY SIMON SMITH

Tom Hardy is the man you want to be. He is the man. Funny, cocky, tough, versatile and most importantly unapologetic. From appearing as hardman prisoner in the movie Bronson to reading There's A Bear In My Chair on Cbeebies on Mother's Day, Hollywood's most bankable actor can do it all. 

If guys want to be him it's mainly because girls want to fuck him, and for that reason alone we've compiled a helpful four-point checklist to help. 

BE A DOG MAN 

Hardy is the sort of dog lover that puts his money where his mouth is. He's often seen on the red carpet with his trusty Woody - his Labrador mix. This obviously isn't Woody below but a St. Bernard-cross called Georgia seen in a Details magazine interview to promote the movie Mad Max: Fury Road. In any case, dogs offer the chance for a girl to see the more sensitive, kinder and caring side to your personality and demonstrate that you're not the selfish type. Owning a dog also shows you're the type of guy that can commit to a long-term relationship. Goldfish do not offer the same benefits. 

 

EMBRACE YOUR ODDNESS 

Whereas Tom doesn't tend to post embarrassing photos images anymore on his social, once over he did. His old Myspace is a treasure trove of cringe. The "About Me" section is pure poetry. In it he states: "My head is like a dangerous neighbourhood I should never be in it without an appropriate adult. left to my own devices I'll crash the motor." It appears the man isn't embracing social anymore - unsurprisingly given that below photo - however, the key thing to take from his NSFW account is that before becoming a Hollywood A-lister Tom embraced all sides of his weirdness. Just have a look at that treasure trove.

OWN ONE FUCKING GREAT COAT 

Every man has that one coat that he considers his suit of armour. His go-to item of understatement...but in reality is one big dose of a statement. For Tom it's the chunky as fuck shearling coat (below). It's not just the fact he's standing in a Five Guys sipping on a massive soft drink, or the fact he's staring away from the camera with that I-know-you're-there-but-I'll-pretend-like-you're-not-pose, it's the fact he owns that coat. That coat could be worn by no other.

To see other great examples of shearling coats check out this definitive gallery here. Just avoid Drake's at number 11. He looks like a yeti. 

HAVE A STRONG STARE 

If Chuck Norris is king of the punching world then Tom Hardy takes the hardman stare crown hands down. Look at him below as Reggie Kray in the movie Legend. He has the stone-cold look of a man who isn't going to be too sympathetic to your bullshit. But of course, a stare is only effective if you're maintaining eye contact with the person otherwise you'll appear confused or drunk. Your stare should be strong enough that you don't need to follow up with actual words. And of course, never resort to violence. Not unless you're an actual 1960's gangster living in the east of London. 

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Goodwin Smith

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